Paladin

Paladin has nothing on me. But who even remembers Richard Boone, that tough-looking gunfighter with the dark cowboy hat and mustache? That star of black and white 1957 television in the early days when everything shut down overnight?

In this drama, he was a cultured bon vivant who relocated from Boston to San Francisco, an expert at chess, and lover of fine clothes; he spoke several languages and was an aficionado of Chinese martial arts. He was an early Superman or western Robinhood, who, when called upon to help folks in trouble, changed from his Bostonian finery into a black leather gun belt with a knight chess piece insignia on his holster and a .45 revolver with a rifled barrel. He also had a concealed Remington derringer, though I don’t remember any bloody shoot-‘em-ups; it was all fisticuffs.

I don’t know if anyone from a younger generation would put up with this flimflam now, but at the time, it was a pretty darn exciting TV show for a kid. I was one of those girls who had a belt with holsters and two cap guns! And I always liked that snappy motto, “Have Gun — Will Travel.”

So this seemed like a good place to start my tale about heading home from the Southwest wild country of Silver City, New Mexico. Not that I was attacked by horse rustlers in the sage brush, or lost the trail in the desert and had to ration the last drop of water in my canteen or suck moisture from a saguaro. It’s just a catchy title I’ve always wanted to use for something — and this is it.

Rims and tires

So here goes: whether they’re falling off airplanes, Comstock wagons, or automobiles, wheels are pretty essential equipment for traveling. I’ve had trouble with my wheels since I left my 2004 Volvo wagon in the dust and transferred to a bigger beefier SUV a couple years ago. I now know that those round thingies — featured every so often in a New York Times caveman cartoon — are actually not wheels but tires. Wheels are metal, or some facsimile, tires are rubber.

For reasons known only to the Volvo powers that be, the tires on my new used Volvo SUV are a non-standard 21-inches. (I found this out the hard way.) There are only two manufacturers in the world that make this odd-ball size and there are no manufacturers of chains or socks — tires now have socks in the winter! — for this size; and even if you could find 21-inch tires it would take weeks to get them transported to wherever you are when you need them.

Buying a car never in my experience included asking about tire size, but believe me, it is now on my list of questions. In Grants Pass, on my way south from the Peninsula, I was informed I needed — and pronto! — a new set of tires, which took four days while Jackson and I twiddled our thumbs and tried not to buy donuts. (Grants Pass has one of the best donut shops on the West Coast — The Jelly Donut.) Eventually we got moving again.

Fast forward a month. On the way home, I stopped to visit friends in Paradise, California where I discovered I had low tire pressure, front right. No problem — get air. Nope. I had a busted tire rim, and I now know that wheel rims are needed to keep tires in place. It’s a combo deal. My tires were perfect (see “new” above), but the appropriate 21-inch wheel would cost $1,200 and take four days to arrive. After I finished fuming, my light bulb came on and I asked about switching everything over to 20-inch tires and wheel rims. Yes, it’s possible.

Buying two sets of new tires in a month is not something I recommend; however it got me on the road sooner and seemed a good investment for the future. I now have a set of what I’m calling Darth Vader tires — they are 20-inch all-black rims and tires, non-standard for my all-white Volvo. When I talked to my Portland dealer he said Volvo chose the 21-inch wheels because “aesthetically they filled out the Volvo frame better.” I do not need my frame filled out. I need tires I can find at any tire shop north or south. I’ve become a rebel Volvo owner, and I’m darn proud of it. Here endeth my tale.

Food Bank Fundraiser April 24th

Now that I’m home, I can recommend several happenings on the Peninsula which I’d like to promote. First, the Food Bank fundraiser is taking place at the Peninsula Senior Center on April 24. “Dine It Forward” I think will prove to be a fascinating evening including a Italian dinner — chicken parmesan and spaghetti dinner with rolls (made by chef Nanci Main), salad, and a dessert buffet — and both a silent and live auction. The items for the silent auction are up now for perusal and bidding at the Senior Center. Just stop by and post your bid. Notices and descriptions are lined up around the main hall and include a range of goodies: oil change, grocery gift certificates, festival tickets (Blues, Water Music, Music in the Gardens, Christmas Concert), romantic night at the Shelburne plus $75, clam guns, electric fireplace, jewelry, lots of arts, even garden compost.

The live auction should be action-packed — who will win the adventure with Daneka Ewert, owner of Bold? Or your own personal home concert performed by Fred Carter? Or two fishing charters donated by Shake and Bake? Or? This is the tip of the iceberg on fun stuff. Good food is sure to be provided and hilarity provoked. Doors open at 5 p.m., dinner starts at 6 p.m., and the live auction begins at 6:45 p.m. or whenever the meal wraps up. Don’t miss it!

Maggie Stuckey says, “Thank you!”

Local writer, soup-maker and gardener extraordinaire, Maggie Stuckey is hosting a thank you party at the Peninsula Arts Center at 2 p.m. on April 14. “That’s National Gardening Day,” Maggie says and continues. “As I was watching all the Covid-panicked new gardeners in 2020, I suddenly thought ‘This is a lot like what happened during World War II when people planted vegetables in whatever little piece of ground they could find. Maybe what we’re seeing is a modern-day version of Victory Gardens. And wouldn’t it be great if I could find some people who remember those gardens and can share their stories?’” And, by gosh, she did and wrote a book about it.

This event is Maggie’s way of acknowledging and thanking the folks who shared their gardening stories with her: among them were locals Clay Nichols, Sandy Stonebreaker, Dobby Wiegardt, Marian Lee, Nyel Stevens, Margaret Staudenraus, Mary Funk. Some will be present to retell their tales, and there will also be live music from Sea Strings (Bill and Janet Clark and Ray Hunt), Fred Carter, and Soulful Variations (Jason Sheaux and Lee Moos). There could even be some sing-along involved.

So, if you have wheels (and tires) or can borrow a ride from a friend, I’d say these are not to be missed. Roll on in to some quirky Peninsula events coming soon to a venue near you!