A rainbow emerges from the clouds and the Oysterville mudflats on New Year’s Eve day 2022.

You got to ac-cent-tchu-ate the positive

E-lim-i-nate the negative

Latch on to the affirmative

Don’t mess with Mr. In-between.

— Harold Arlen and Johnny Mercer

Dear Friends, it’s 2023! Rather than think about those typical new year’s resolutions and what we feel we need to correct about ourselves — lose weight, exercise more, eat better, stop procrastinating — a friend suggests that we think about the positives: what we’d like to have more of in our lives. Some studies have even proven that thinking about what we want to add to our lives is actually more effective than trying to take things away.

So let’s banish 2022 and its many disappointments — one woman put it this way “this past year felt like we were running against the wind with cement shoes.” At the very least, maybe we can lower our expectations and go along with a trending hashtag #dontsuck2023! Or, on the upside, perhaps we just need more cowbell (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/More_Cowbell)! Here are some great thoughts about life-enhancements from friends near and far.

Pull Quote

My favorite submission: ‘More donuts! Every year I make a resolution to cut back on donuts — and I usually break it within hours if not minutes. Hey, they’re good, and everyone needs some secret pleasure.’

More poets/poetry

Let’s start with notes from some poet/writer friends:

• More soup, More poems, More kisses, More hugs, More saké, More peace, More prayers, More compliments, More gratitude for what is.

• What I want more of in 2023? I’m hoping to cultivate and support a kind of openness, an iridescent readiness, to catch luminous moments — the unexpected magic — that appears daily, even in difficult times.

• Kindness, generosity without agenda/true altruism, integrity, truth, empathy, advances in criminal and social justice, significant strides in caring for our planet and wildlife.

• What if everyone in the world played Wordle? Would we all have a greater appreciation for words? The “aha moment” of discovery? The realization that trivial activities can bring a moment of escape from the seriousness of daily activity? Note: this may only apply to retired folks!

• More time for reading: the pleasure of reading has no bounds. There are always new books to discover, old books to savor, and even unimaginable books to write. I expect heaven to be a library, with no books on hold!

• I am trying to work to a place beyond what the world so urgently needs: cooperation, collaboration, consideration, community, creativity, conservation.

More green

And from my gardening peeps:

• More creation of safe shelters for insects. More plots of tenderly undisturbed soil. More homegrown vegetables. More apples.

• Let’s spend 2023 tending to the earth around us with mindfulness. Plant a garden. Stay mindful by reading an inspirational book like “Braiding Sweetgrass” by Robin Wall Kimmerer, or “Ten Tomatoes that Changed the World” by William Alexander, or “Wolf Totem” by Jiang Rong.

• Another person’s idea of green: More money, More broccoli, More nature.

• Sunflowers in our gardens, birds, bees!!!!

• More chickens!

More music

Musicians, let’s send a few more harmonies into the air:

• Everyone can sing, though maybe some of us should restrict it to showers or solo driving, but we all have innate appreciation for music. Who wouldn’t want to have more music in their lives? I look forward to more playing and singing, both with others and at home.

• My piano is just asking to be played!

• More jazz.

• This chick is committing to getting back to playing the piano to soothe my soul!

• More ukuleles.

Changes in every-day-ness

• This is a brilliant question, one that changes my thinking/approach to the new year. I would like more: Plants, Sunny days, Reading, Energy, Time in nature, To say Yes more, Time reading a physical newspaper, See more art exhibits, Eat more vegetables, Bake more cakes, Opportunities for safe travel here and abroad.

• More time for my art, gardening, walking, and more geocaching too!

• More leftovers: we’re notorious for wasting food. [Americans throw away one third of the food they buy.] No no no!

• Love the reversal idea. I want to spend more time moving my body. Want to be more curious, to wonder and wander often, to simplify possessions and their obligations (free up the mental and physical space), to be open to moments (rather than driven by calendar dates), to observe and relish small wonders. To actively practice forgiveness, acceptance, gratitude.

• More courtesy. Drivers, bicyclers (like me), jaywalkers, all seem to have increased their lack of awareness of others, and assume their entitlement to be first. We all need to slow down, look around, and be more courteous of others.

• Pausing, looking, the really seeing kind of looking; and stopping to listen, like my friend Mariellen does. When she asks “How are you?” She really wants to know!!! And she remembers what you tell her. She is 90 years old.

More social awareness

• Great idea. What I’d like to see in 2023, more sharing of wealth so that no one is hungry or homeless; more educational opportunities for all so that no one is unprepared for a job that pays a living wage [just a note that the official 2022 federal minimum wage is $7.25/hour!]; enhanced awareness about finite resources and what is a fair share for each of us.

• More joy. More understanding. More compassion.

• More tolerance. For all our vaunted differences as a region, nation, world, we are all 100% human; we have the same needs and desires: take care of families, especially our elderly and children, find meaningful work, and love. Everything else is just noise. And too often the noise drowns out our fundamental human commonality.

• This year I’d like to add to those qualities that are a bit amorphous — not quite visible when they are there but oh so apparent when they are lacking: compassion and empathy.

• More charity. We can all do more to help others. My goal is to find a niche where I can both contribute and learn from the folks I engage with.

• More hope. How else can we address climate change, war in Ukraine, famine, plague, if we don’t have a (vast) reservoir of hope?

• More justice (and less Supreme Court Justice)!

More friends

Many people shared the need to reprioritize what’s important:

• More time to spend with friends, travel, and pursue my art endeavors. I seem to waste too much of that precious commodity on thought and needless actions. I plan to organize my thoughts and habits and get on with checking off that to-do list. First and foremost will be travel.

• Here’s my resolution for the wounds of a woefully divided country: more human bridges. When meeting people, rather than rehearsing what divides us, I would like to see what connections can be built between us, rekindling community one conversation at a time.

• I would like to add more friends to my life — friends that I am able to see more often than once a month or so. Friends who I can have coffee with at least weekly, or call on a moment’s notice to dash off somewhere for no good reason.

• More real conversations — why not call once in a while instead of texting?

More freudenfreude

So there you have it. Lots of ideas to choose from (and an inordinate number of exclamation points!!). Or make your own list. We could also use more freudenfreude. Unlike schadenfreude, which is taking pleasure in others’ misfortunes, freudenfreude is the happiness we feel when someone else succeeds, even if it doesn’t involve us. More joy elsewhere doesn’t mean less joy for us — it’s a renewable resource!

And, finally, my favorite submission: “More donuts! Every year I make a resolution to cut back on donuts — and I usually break it within hours if not minutes. Hey, they’re good, and everyone needs some secret pleasure.”

Now my friends, go forth into 2023 joyfully.